Quarter Life Crisis

Happy Birthday to me!

Last week my car broke and the repair cost me enough that I decided it was time for a new car. If I was going to be pouring money into a vehicle I figured I should enjoy it a little more. Plus I turn 25 this month and figured a fitting way to celebrate might be by treating myself to a little something. And by a little something I mean a hot red car.

I went in by myself and negotiated and signed (goodness are there a lot of things to sign when buying a car) and accomplished all on my own. It was nerve racking and I woke up this morning at 4am with my stomach in knots, a terrible headache, and just general stress. Without getting into things, I don't have any contact with my parents, which means I've had to learn how to do a lot of "grown up" things on my own. This was probably the most major so far though and definitely had me feeling anxious.

I have to say, in the end I feel really wonderful about things. I tend to have a hard time balancing between my desire to be independent and the feeling that I must know how to do everything for myself and knowing when I really should ask for help. I struggled a bit with not knowing if I should break down and request someone a bit more knowledgeable accompany me but I feel empowered by having done this myself. I feel happy with my purchase and capable and while at times I can still feel like I'm figuring out how to be a grown up, today I felt like I may really have a hold on that whole thing.