Spring Trends 2011

I love how every season anyone even remotely fashion related decides to make a list of trends for the upcoming three months until they need to do it again for the next three months. Because if you didn't know, you can only wear something for that long before you are tragically, painfully unfashionable. This morning I was lucky enough to receive emails from both Neiman Marcus and Nordstrom about the Spring 2011 trends.

According to Nordstrom they are:
Pale Neutrals
The Fit and Flare Dress
The Kitten Heel (Please don't wear kitten heels)
The Romantic Blouse
The Framed Satchel
Flared and Wide Leg Pants
Maxi Dresses and Skirts (This one I'll give them since pretty much every one in the entire world from Michael Kors to American Apparel has a pleated maxi skirt out this season)
Statement Rings
The Minimal Jacket
Modern Oxfords

Here's what Neimans has to say:
Coral
Boho Influences
Florals (This is definitely something new for Spring...)
Stripes
Wide-Leg Pants
The White Wardrobe
Flat Sandals
The Spring Face (What even is this?)
Long Necklaces
Crossbody Bags

And, because I love you, I decided to do some research to see what others apparently in the know have to say about it.

Style.com thinks Spring is going to be all about:
Hyper Color
Lace
Prints
Mid-Calf Length
White
The 70s
Pants (I'm not making that up)

Elle predicts:
The 70s
Mixed Prints
Bold Colors
Straight and Narrow Silhouettes
Metallics
Sports Bras as Tops (also not making that one up)
Cutouts
Sheer Materials

Harpers Bazarre says the trends will be:
"Eclectic Chic" (Don't worry, I don't know what it means either)
Bold Colors
"Printed Matter"
"Pajama Dressing"
Minimal White
The 70s

And then, with my most favorite list of Spring 2011 trends is Glamour:
60s Coats
Military Jackets
High Waisted Flare Jeans
70s Dresses
"Mixed Happy Prints"
Platforms
Trench Dresses
Sheer Layers
"Something Simple and Rust Colored"
Japanese Inspired Style
Neutrals and Nudes
Preppy Accesories
Bangles
"Serious Pants"
Citrus Colors
"Comfy Clothes"

So, the good news is pretty much whatever you wear this Spring you're going to be on trend pointe. Because I think every single possible clothing choice fits into some category on these lists. The bad news is our Spring is going to be filled with people wearing sheer, boldly hued, Japanese inspired pajamas from the 70s.

Seriously Fashion Industry, why do you make yourself look so stupid sometimes? You're actually fun when you aren't trying so hard.